Before further discussion of Holden Caulfield’s “Sleep tight, ya morons!” goodbye to Pencey Prep, and to get my 9th graders fully into their English minds last period on Tuesday, I rattled them out of their seats and asked them trot around the room on imaginary horses. It was my way of defusing one student’s answer to my opening question: “Hey, guys–Family Weekend’s almost here! What’re  you looking forward to?” and hearing: “Our drill’s gonna suck.” (He corrected his use of the vernacular before I could get the corrective in.)

I was pretty sure that, by way of remedy, a controlled lope in Room C might remind them of who’s holding the reins.

The student’s quick reply reminded me that what’s on their minds is not always what I think. Perfect synchronicity for guiding them through The Catcher in the Rye–and a prompt for my post-haste asking three years’ worth of advisees–now sophomores, juniors, and seniors and veterans of these gatherings of the clan–what advice they’d give new students about handling this busy, highly emotional time with family. Their wisdom:

Nan ’13: Definitely take the time to slow down and have quality time with your parents. It can be a little weird at first having your parents on campus for the first time and meeting all your friends, so make sure you have time to just talk about your experience at Thacher so far with them.

Lachlan ’14: If you need some time to yourself, do not feel bad about asking for it. Your parents understand that this weekend is stressful, so don’t worry about asking for some relaxation time.

Kelsey ’13: Remind yourself that your parents made a huge sacrifice to let you come here, and they want to be a part of your lives as much as they can. Although we feel like it’s “our” place now, we have to remember that our parents miss us, cherish the time they get to spend with us, and also really enjoy getting to know and being a part of the school.

Mackenzie ’15: I would say to really not stress. Family Weekend is supposed to be a weekend where you reunite with your family.Yes, there’s a lot going on, and times where you’re running from this place to that.  Just embrace it.

Sarah ’15: Try to stay as organized as possible. I kept a schedule in my room and checked it frequently to make sure that I wasn’t forgetting anything. Also, tell your parents in advance if you have a performance or somewhere that you need to be at a specific time so that they don’t make conflicting plans or reservations.

And from Paul ’13, with whom I crossed paths just before writing this blog:

Hold their hands in the dark. You know your way around; they don’t.