Tag Archives: comfort zone
The Big Chill (1)

The Big Warm

Remember three decades ago, The Big Chill, a breakout film for Glenn Close, William Hurt, Kevin Kline, Jeff Goldblum, Meg Tilley, JoBeth Williams, and–as the dead guy whose face no one ever sees, Kevin Costner? (Clearly, I’m beyond worrrying about dating myself.) The first morning the old college friends are together, each comes into the big country kitchen at a different moment, to find running–well, jogging, back then–shoes that Harold, the successful businessman, has brought for everyone and stacked on the island. Time-lapse photography shows the space filling and emptying and filling again, as the day advances and each person finds his or her size.

I think of that scene often, reminded of it by the scene at my own kitchen counter every Saturday night. Open House can, and often does start with a single student coming in and planting herself or himself opposite me and the ovens, where we’ll chat, just us, for a few minutes. Sometimes, it’s a small gaggle flying in, landing, and lining up there, claiming every one of the six stools, some even doubled up. Often, when I turn to take cookies out of the oven, I turn back to a whole different set of faces, another conversation, new but known voices laughing. The disembodied hand, at the end of a reaching arm, grabs a cookie cooling on the rack; another extends with a napkin ready for one right off the sheet. If I follow the arm up to the shoulder and head, I know who I’m dealing to. The crowd can be dense.

A month or so ago, the experience was even more Big Chillish, the dinner for alums and their friends and families converging with the start of Open House. So there, at the counter, each time I turned, a conflation of eras–someone from a mid-century CdeP class next to a student who just figured out his second term class schedule. Someone’s little sister making friends with someone else’s little sister, both of them elbow-to-elbow with seniors and grads of just last June.

If I had a camera instead of a spatula, you could see it, too, from my point of view. Privileged, I know.

 

(Full disclosure: This photo is from last year. But they’re alums now!)

 

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Back from Fresno

Late on a Saturday morning after the Cross Country State Championship races, Isobel and I were driving back from Fresno and talking over the season. After examining and evaluating our training, looking at the mistakes I made as well as those avoided, Isobel said: “I remember my first day of Cross Country in September. You told me to run to the cow pens with Dr. D, which I did, and I thought I was going to die.” I remarked that she had come a long way in just three months, from that first, short and slow, but agonizing run to the #4 girl on the fourth best team in California. After a minute or two of silence, I asked her why she came back the next day. “I don’t know, she said, “There was just something about it I wanted to do.”

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